Binging!

why doest thou have to eat to stifle my feelings?

another binge consisting of peanut butter(350) jelly(150) 2 hermits(140) nut mix(140) figbars(280) hard candy (14) sunflower seeds(30) luckily i stopped after that! :) damage done =1104calories :/ i overestimated but just to make sure! :)

My mom was also an extreme bitch today saying that I'm the cause of all her problems, ans she'd be so much happier if I was just normal. I hate it when she goes all self pity on me, its overrated -.-
I want to stop eating and starrve so she feels bad but i cant seem to stop eating no matter how hard i try. Food is ALWAYS on my mind.

I didnt go to softball practice today because I wanted to go home and eat. How sad is that. I really need to work harder on my goals. One day i'll fast, one day.
Please give me strength!

Family is also forcing me to eat dinner now after my binge. I dont want to but I do. Food is so addictive. They think i eat so little but really I eat alot, they're just not around to see it. Not cool..